04252018 Headline:

Ground Control: Mr. Mannion

By Phoenix Flyer

Dear Ground Control,

How did Mr. Mannion create chemistry? It’s indisputable that he did, but how? What were his motivations?

Sincerely,

Curious Chemist

Dear Lesser Chemist,

Of course our exquisite chem-god — pronounced (Che-em) as decreed by the lord himself — has blessed us with his marvelous creation. As for how, well, some believe that before chemistry, there was a world full of heathen cake. Mannion, who could no longer stand this atrocity, went on a mission to banish cake and replace it with glorious pie. In the process, he accidentally discovered amazing jokes, perfect Spanglish, and, of course, chemistry, bringing joy to millions.

Anyways, enough speculation, let’s just get stoiched (you’re welcome) that he set aside some of his time to construct this wonderful class just for us.

Let me know of any other theories you’ve heard!

Ground Control

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