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Snark Attack Printers

Ok, so the printers are pissing me off again. This time however, it’s not just the machine itself. It’s also the humans that operate these machines that really grind my gears. The printers themselves work off and on, and are never close [...]

Ground Control Christmas and College

Dear Ground Control, I am a senior and everyone around me seems stressed out over “college apps.” I’m afraid of sounding dumb to my friends but, what’s a “college app”? Sincerely, Confused (but not) in College   Dearest Confused, Ah, [...]

Snark Attack Fear of Change

  Snark Attack: Fear Change   To paraphrase one of my favorite quotes: “The only permanent things in this world are change and your inability to deal with it”   Let’s get one thing straight here, people. Everything changes, [...]

Ground Control TOO MUCH PUMPKIN

Dear Ground Control, With autumn comes everyone’s least favorite Starbucks drink: the Pumpkin Spice Latte. Recently, I have noticed that it doesn’t end there. IT’S EVERYWHERE. Pumpkin spice this and pumpkin spice that. I hate pumpkin spice. [...]

Snark Attack

You know what really grinds my gears? I’m getting heated just thinking about it. My blood boils with the heat of a thousand red suns. I’m full of uncontrollable, undeniable, uncomfortable, unimaginable, unintelligible, unceasing, uncanny, [...]

Ground Control

Dear Ground Control, What should I bring to college? I’m confused. Sincerely, Stumped Senior   Dear Senior, I have surveyed every college student I could find on campus, and, after some serious deliberation and very long and difficult [...]

Snark Attack

Do you know what everyone loves to the bottom of their heart space? High school parking lots. Do you know what their favorite thing about high school parking lots is? People who park like absolute jack@$$es.   I’m talking about the people [...]

Ground Control

Dear Ground Control, Every time I park my car in the neat striped spot, people yell at me. I don’t understand why people are being so mean. What do I do? Sincerely, Parking Perp   Dear Perp, After much thought about your problem, and [...]

Death by a Thousand Websites

Canvas. Illuminate. Pearson. Big History. Dot Info. Myawesometeacherwebsite.com. Myotherevenmoreawesomewebsiteformyclassformystudents.blogspot.com. Oh yeah, and Google Sites – lots and lots of Google Sites.   Okay, I get it – [...]

Ground Control – FaceTime and Hangman

Dear Ground Control, My sister is always on FaceTime really loudly with her friends and it’s really annoying, but I feel like it’s rude to ask her to stop. Sincerely, Annoyed and Aggravated   Dear Aggravated, I’m afraid [...]

Ways to procrastinate

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