Ground Control No More Advice or Spirit

Dear Ground Control,

What am I going to do now that I can’t get wondrous advice from ground control? Any last words?


A Confused Student


Dear Confused Student,

Wow, I’m sad. I’m kidding, is there really a point to worrying? Why not reread all the advice already given? Generally people have the same problems over and over again.

Anyways, to answer your question, I am going to tell you:

  1. Slow down, take time and appreciate what is going on around you.
  2. Have
  3. Why would I be responding to your question right now? Oh no, are you going to accuse your own question of being fake too?
  4. Do you have anything better to do? Anything at all?

As you think about these questions, my best advice is to try and move on without us. Though we will miss you trying to

Have a fake day,

Ground Control


Dear Ground Control,

Why do we really even have all the spirit stuff? It’s the last weeks of school why can’t we just end it?


Ready To Go Home


Dear The End Is Near,

I don’t think about it in that way, it’s school bonding! The people we got stuck next to for the last 8 months, 5 days a week, 6.5 hours a day, them, we get to be friends towards the end <3

We will

Additional Comment: If you are one of the handful of people who actually read the newspaper, we here at The Phoenix Flyer greatly appreciate you. You make all the time we spend in class, the deadlines, and painful distributions definitely worth it!

Totally not salty at all,

Ground Control

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